Over the past few months I’ve delivered several foundational articles outlining my core philosophies.
I showed you the foundation to a successful life in Build a Better Life: The Basics.
I gave you the moral and ethical framework for a healthy and honest sex life in A Moral Framework for Sexual Health.
With that in hand, I taught you what kind of woman makes a great partner in What Does a Keeper Look Like: How to Chose a Woman Today.
And I’ve even written about how to read people’s minds to create deeper and more fulfilling relationships in Mind-Mapping: A Survival Skill.
All in all, you guys now have a fantastic start on how to manage yourself in today’s dating and relationship market.
But one area I wanted to expand upon is social and sexual dominance as first laid out in in 4 Ways to Be More Dominant Right Now: Jack Murphy’s Pocket Guide to Dominance.
In that article, we established the how’s and why’s of basic male dominance and female submission, uncovering statistics which show beyond a doubt a majority of women have strong desires to be dominated in the bedroom – and in my opinion – out of it as well.
My 4 Ways to Be More Dominant Right Now post gave you some advice on how to capitalize on that information. Many of you reported back with great results:
@jackmurphylive Tested some of ur tips on how to be more dominant last nite – worked like a charm
— LA Playboy (@thelaplayboy) December 10, 2015
“Everything went smoothly and it set the tone for the night. Looking forward to more tips, these were gold!” — Nick https://t.co/y8Q7jAdO4r
— Jack Murphy (@jackmurphylive) January 13, 2016
This stuff works, it’s clear.
So now is the time to take things to the next level. You’ve got the basics here on lifestyle, game, and fitness – and now you’re ready to read my advanced guide on sexual dominance.
Remember guys, without mastering the first steps some of this will be too advanced for you. I tell you this not to brag, but to warn you – premature application of my advanced techniques will likely backfire and make things worse.
Master the basics, master yourself – then only think to master you girl in turn.
What follows is a system for securing your social and sexual dominance over your (willing) girl.
Systems are the key to success in any endeavor and our sexual relationships with women are no different.
Utilize my system to take your girl from intrigued submissive ingenue, to completely devoted sex slave.
Not all women will admit they are ready for such training. The forces of feminism and devolving social norms have colluded to separate women from their true desires. Yet deep inside, we know even the most ardent feminist yearns to be dominated and even degraded.
It is in this submission to your male power they find solace and safety. Honor your woman by freeing her from these chains, and empowering her to find the freedom of submission.
Without further ado, I present to you:
You Deserve to Be a Sex God Part III: Jack Murphy’s Guide to Advanced Dominance Training
1. Make Her Masturbate in Front of You
Masturbation is by nature a solo act, done purely for self-satisfaction. We all do it, some more than others: touching ourselves and giving ourselves pleasure is an intrinsic human behavior. It is typically done in the privacy of solitude, creating space for ourselves to be raw and unencumbered by fear, insecurity, or shame. Although it’s nearly universal, religion and temperance shame some who do it and these thoughts have permeated society such that masturbation is often looked down upon.
Bringing this intimate act into the light of observation is a powerful method of breaking down the walls between you and your woman, creating solidarity in space that was once purely private.
Many women recoil at the idea of masturbating in front of their partner. They are afraid of how they look, how they act, and most importantly: they are terrified of demonstrating their awareness of their own sexual desires.
Women are trained to hide their sexuality and project chastity.
Whether it be an evolutionary skill or control by society, women almost always keep masturbation completely private. Witnessing a woman express her deepest animalistic behaviors robs of her that secrecy, exposing to you her dirty pig-like needs. When you witness a woman grind her pussy with her own hands, leading herself towards reckless orgasmic abandon, you gain a clear window into her insatiable sexual appetites.
Women have little to no refractory period. Unlike men, who need some period of time to regain their sexual energy post-orgasm, a woman maintains her arousal plateau without crashing into the valley of recovery. A woman can grind out one, two, three or even more orgasms quickly, each seemingly coming more easily than the last. Forcing her to display this enormous sexual appetite reveals her to be the slut she truly is, capable of fucking longer and more frequently than her male counterpart.
Perhaps they are taught to hide this so as to not scare us, lest we feel impotent relative to their carnal hungers. But we as evolved men of high value do not fear this sexual power.
In fact, it is our fearlessness in the face of her horniness which gives us power.
We not only are aware of her needs but we understand them and can harness them for our own purposes. Putting her sexuality on the table and jointly consolidating control of it in your hands liberates her from her own nervous stewardship, trusting you to be without judgement as well as confident in your ability to guide it in service of your own.
An elementary tactic is to have her simply masturbate alongside of you in bed, laying next to you as she touches herself and brings herself to orgasm.
More intermediate is to have her sit in a chair in front of you, legs spread, naked, and exposed for your viewing pleasure.
Expert level and my favorite way to execute this advanced dominance technique is to have her masturbate while simultaneously sucking my dick.
Here’s how you do it:
First, tell her to kneel between your legs and take you into her mouth. Tell her to touch herself while she sucks. As her climax approaches, tell her to gag herself on your cock while she comes. If she times it right, she should be gagging hard on your dick right as her entire body shakes with her self-induced climax. This is a hands-free experience for you, as you are observing her while providing her with a hard dick to choke on.
Once she is finished you have the double pleasure of being hard and ready to go, while her pussy is wet and engorged with blood following her orgasm. A swollen wet pussy is the finest reward she can offer you, and along with her deepened submission, the entire process is a gift laid at your feet and your sexual dominance.
Pro tip: As she is sucking your dick and fingering herself, coach her along. Use commands like “grind that pussy,” or “get that orgasm, you slut.” Talk her through entire process like I outlined here. Listening to you talk to her while she fingers her pussy and sucks your dick will only deepen her attraction to you.
2. Make Her Repeat Her Mantras During Sex
Dominance must be reinforced constantly. Slacking in this area will lead to backsliding and eventually deterioration of the relationship. She wants to be reminded constantly of her boundaries, her role, and your place in her life.
As evolved men, we understand the powers of persuasion. Repetitive question and answer sessions with affirmative responses solidify her commitment to you. What follows is a script you can use to help her use self-talk and confirmation to maintain her submissive nature and solidify the rules you’ve set forth for your sexual relationship. You can use these questions at anytime during foreplay or sex, but the best is to do it while your dick is deep inside her (mouth, pussy, or ass).
Like a good attorney, start with some simple questions. After you get her answering “yes” to the easy ones, escalate towards the higher level questions. This is a process that can take several sessions to get through. Start with the easy ones and as you both get comfortable take it to the next level.
You should talk about these things before hand, don’t surprise her with new information here. This is reinforcement of conversations you’ve had previously in non-sexual situations. Use the sex time to hammer home the concepts and form the foundation for your dominance.
- Do you love your daddy? Yes.
- Do you love fucking your daddy? Yes.
- Are you daddy’s good little girl? Yes.
- Do you you want to make daddy happy? Yes.
- Do you want to make daddy proud? Yes.
- Are you ready for your special prize (my sex). Yes, daddy please.
- What is your job? To get daddy off.
- When do you do your job? Whenever daddy wants.
- How do you do your job? However daddy wants.
- Where do you do your job? Wherever daddy wants.
- How often do you do your job? As often as daddy wants.
- Who do you do your job with? Whoever daddy wants.
All the while you are deep inside her, slowly raising her temperature and the pace as you proceed to reinforcing the rules:
- Who does daddy fuck? Whoever daddy wants.
- When does daddy fuck them? Whenever daddy wants.
- Where does daddy fuck them? Wherever daddy wants.
- How does daddy fuck them? However daddy wants.
- Do you love your daddy? Yes, desperately.
- Do you want to be a good little girl? Yes, daddy, I do.
This question and answer ladder is extremely powerful. I’ve used it countless times with my current girlfriend. It can be used during sex as I suggest here or as a way to kick off foreplay. It never fails to get the juices flowing and to make the sex even hotter than normal.
But most importantly, it establishes and re-establishes the nature of our relationship: I am in control, I am dominant. She fucks me when I want, how I want, wherever I want and as often as I want. And I fuck whoever I want, whenever I want. Repeated over and over again during intimate and vulnerable times like sex puts these thoughts at the core of her being and reinforces the framework for our relationship.
And don’t forget, at the end, always reward her by telling her what a good job she is doing and how extremely proud you are of her. This is why she does everything, to gain your approval and most especially to hear you say: “Good girl, that’s daddy’s good little girl.”
She wants nothing more than to feel loved and secure. To a woman, one way this comes from adherence to a clear set of rules and expectations which she can trust and follow knowing when she does, her rewards are coming. Mantras such as these remind her of these rules, giving comfort to the security and structure of your love and dominance. Reinforcing these internalizes your strength, her love, and how the two of you work together to create this atmosphere and dynamic.
Some of these may bring up difficult emotions for her like jealousy or insecurity – your ability to heal her afterwards is part of creating a safe place where you are able to calm those fears and bring her to a place of comfort.
Lead her there and reap the rewards.
Special Note around “Daddy:” Daddy is what my girlfriend calls me. It is meant to reflect and reinforce the power dynamic between the two of us; I am older and wiser, she is younger and needs my support. It is not meant to imply an actual father/daughter relationship. That being said, using the word “Daddy” may not be for you – that’s fine. Just pick another name that suits you, whatever it might be. Sir, Papí, Daddy-o, whatever. You don’t even need a separate name, this just works for me and it works for her so we go with it. You chose what works for you.
3. Make Her Fuck Herself in the Ass with Your Dick
Anal sex on its own is a act of submission. A woman must relax her body in such a way to accept your cock in a place where it does not ordinarily go. She must control her body and literally open her insides to allow your penetration. Sometimes it can be painful for her and she must overcome her fear and anticipation of pain to accommodate you. You are controlling her and she in turn is controlling her body in service.
Like everything else in life, the frame here is key. Tell her she must take your dick and shove it into her ass to give you pleasure. You’re creating a situation in which she puts your pleasure over her (potential) pain in service of your needs.
Lie on your back, have her straddle you.
Command her, “fuck yourself in the ass with my cock.”
Watch her squirm in pain and discomfort as she pushes back gingerly. Witness her squeals and strain as she works your dick into her body. Each additional inch of you she takes inside her deepens her submission.
Few things are more submissive and solely for your pleasure than forcefully opening her body to take your dick.
The act is a metaphor for your relationship.
You have desires and needs and she wishes to serve them. She wishes to serve them in spite of potential pain, humiliation, or even an unwanted mess. She overcomes these fears for the purpose of pleasing you. The physical act of opening her body to you programs her for the mental capacity of submitting to your guidance.
If she can manage to shove your dick in her ass, she will be more open to accepting your dominance in other areas of life.
Sacrificing her body, consenting to pain, and overcoming humiliation in service of your pleasure mirrors the work she must do in her mind to overcome her programming which may fight against her innate submission that has been hidden/repressed for so long.
Remember, like the rest of these techniques, this is an exercise for the both of you. It could have some undesired results: she may not be able to cope with the pain or there might be a mess afterwards. She has to know you trust and care for her enough to overlook these should it not work out perfectly the first time. Getting a cock pushed through her asshole is an exercise in trust, relaxation, and security. Reassure her first before you try this advanced technique. Once you do, you’re on your way to having your very own real life sex robot.
These techniques are meant to deliver results which go beyond the bedroom and into day-to-day life:
If you open her ass, you open her mind. And in that opening you will insert your body, your masculinity, and your dominance.
4. Test Her Submission – Put Her in Uncomfortable Situations
Now that you’ve worked through the basics of dominance and tried out these first three advanced techniques, you’re ready to test the depth of her submission by putting her in uncomfortable situations.
The idea is to push her boundaries such that she becomes uneasy but is willing to move past them in an effort to please you. Putting aside her fear in honor of your dominance is an excellent indication your training methods are paying off.
Below is a story from my personal life that can give you an example of potential ways you can test her submission. If this one doesn’t feel right, check the list of other examples I give at the end. If those don’t work for you either – quit being a pussy and start over with the Basics.
I forced her to hit on two guys at the same time at our local bar.
We were hanging out having dinner when I got the idea of having her talk to these two guys at the bar near our table. We were having a nice night out together just talking and laughing like usual. The two guys were facing the other way and hadn’t seen us together.
Surprised at my request, my GF resisted initially, since I told her to go up and basically throw herself at them. They were two average looking dudes, probably blue pilled and hard up, so I thought this might be an interesting experiment just to see how they’d react as well.
As it became clear I was serious, her anxiety level shot way up. On one hand she was nervous just to talk to two dudes at all, her having been off the scene for sometime, but on the other hand, she was scared that doing this would somehow make me upset. She was used to extremely jealous men mate-guarding her with all their beta might and was unaccustomed to a man being unthreatened by something like this (or anything at all).
I knew she was doing it for me and no other reason, so I had little care, but her programming made her very uncomfortable.
She resisted, her eyes were begging me to say “just kidding, babe.” But the longer she stared at me the more she realized I was dead serious.
I knew that pushing her through the anxiety was the point of the exercise. Her doey eyes were not going to melt my resolve. She had to put aside her fears, insecurities, and disbelief in order to simply to follow my commands. I could see it turning her on even as she grew increasingly concerned.
It turned me on too. The idea of her following my orders in spite of her feelings was intoxicating and arousing.
This was excellent foreplay for both of us.
After the proper assurances from me that I would still love her and think the same of her afterwards, she mustered the strength and sauntered her ass over to two strangers with the directions from her Daddy to simply “hit on them.”
I sat back in the booth and watched, casually taking it in and snapping a few surreptitious shots with my phone. I witnessed her submission on display.
The guys were taken aback by her forwardness and simple general pleasantry. It’s not every day a young hot girl makes a move on two schleps at the bar – they must have been surprised. After about ten minutes of watching it was clear nothing too exciting was going to happen, and I eventually gave her the signal to return.
Just like that she wrapped up and split, returning to me calmly watching from my seat, never having moved since she got up.
She trusted me, followed directions, and put herself in an uncomfortable sexual spot – all for my pleasure. The erotic energy between us was turned up, and she realized she thrived when following my orders.
That moment between us elevated our relationship to another level and we’ve never looked back. Each of our subsequent adventures was built from this first act of public obedience.
- Public masturbation / sex
- Participating in a threesome with another woman.
Remember, each of these acts is meant to solidify your dominance and her submission. Using the proper frame of mind virtually any act can be sexualized. At my house, my girlfriend cooks dinner every night. We know she is doing it out of service, which gives even serving dinner a sexual charge. When you’ve implemented the training properly, practically anything/everything she does can be a demonstration of her loyalty to you.
Sexual dominance is not about satisfying your ego at the expense of your lover. It is a proactive effort meant to lift you both to a higher level of existence. Deep down, she craves the strength and protection of a masculine male who will take leadership both in and out of the bedroom.
Culture, feminism, her mother, and probably many of her friends will be forces working against you, unless she happens to come from a traditional patriarchal family. In that case, you’ll know right away- she and her mother will both defer to her father and dad’s presence is felt early on.
But many women today aren’t growing up in a household like that and they’re suffering for it. What I am teaching you here is not just about getting off, it’s about creating the dynamic that will best suit you both in the long term.
You can’t jump right into this stuff however, I am serious when I say you must cover your basics first, otherwise, it will backfire.
True dominance must be congruent with your status and that status must be earned and proven time and time again. Build your body, learn game, develop your lifestyle and then begin to dabble with dominance techniques.
Once you’re established, then go for the advanced stuff, and even then, much of this will be out of reach for many of you. Dominance alone isn’t enough to keep a happy home, however.
All of this must be paired with empathy, understanding, and love. Without it, you’re just an asshole ordering a chick around – and you won’t have her around to do that for much longer.
Don’t forget the reassurance, the reconnection, and the extra affection when she does things which please you and you’ll have not just a loyal submissive, but happy and loving one as well.
If you liked what you read here, you will love my Jack Murphy Live guide to sex, relationships, love, career and more. I’ve curated a curriculum of sorts, something of value for any man who reads it. See what 200,000 other readers have already discovered…all for free.